


floriography

by seijhoes



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Blood, Blood Loss, Character Death, Hanahaki Disease, M/M, Not Canon Compliant, Probably ooc, Unrequited Crush, i apologize for the angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-11
Updated: 2020-08-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:22:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,351
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25837993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seijhoes/pseuds/seijhoes
Summary: floriography is the language of flowers, and is a means of cryptological communication through flower arrangements. Sakusa Kiyoomi is especially well versed in this flower language.
Relationships: Miya Atsumu/Sakusa Kiyoomi (one sided)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 36





	floriography

**Author's Note:**

> so,, I'm kinda worried bc this is kinda really out of character for Sakusa, so please spare me bc I know already !! I just had this idea saved off of twitter, and I wanted to use it, so here it is

The only thing that was more beautiful than Sakusa Kiyoomi himself, was the beautiful garden he had outside of his home.

The flowers were beautiful, vibrant in color, and always in full bloom, even if the flowers themselves weren’t in season or native to Japan. There were pink, red, and white camellias, pink and white carnations, red and yellow chrysanthemums, gardenias, daisies, daffodils, and more. Despite the man hating everything that required getting his hands dirty, he had quite the knack for keeping up the appearance of his garden.

Another thing he had a knack for was floriography, or the language of flowers. None of his teammates would have taken him for being a green thumb in all senses of the word, except maybe Komori, but what they didn’t know was that Sakusa Kiyoomi was a man of mystery; there were a lot of things they didn’t know about him.

***

What everyone on the team did know, however, was how much Miya Atsumu was completely, utterly, madly, and deeply in love with Sakusa Kiyoomi. It was quite obvious, from the flirting, how he was seemingly a lot ‘softer’ around him, and how he went out of his way to do things for him. Even an outsider could tell that he was whipped.

Though, if it wasn’t obvious enough to some, then maybe the red carnations that Atsumu regularly coughed up could paint a better picture. 

Atsumu couldn’t remember when it had first started happening, it was just like he woke up one morning and was greeted with a tickle in his throat and red carnation petals in his hand. It wasn’t even so bad at first, every so often he’d feel his throat get scratchy and he would cough up a few petals. It was a little harder to hide it when he was around other people, but he did his best, even though his friends and brother caught on pretty quickly.

The only person who didn’t seem to notice, or pay any mind to it was the very one who he was pining for, Sakusa. Which was maybe a good thing, because in Atsumu’s head that meant he didn’t know about his gigantic crush on him (but he did, oh he definitely knew).

Everyone tried to convince him to get the surgery to remove the vines that were slowly but surely constricting around his lungs and crawling their way up his windpipe, to take care of this before it got worse or it was too late. But, Atsumu being the stubborn man that he was, refused. After all, if he got the surgery, he’d forget about his feelings towards him altogether. So, he swore that he was going to gain Sakusa’s affections, even if it killed him.

(Which, he didn’t realize just how true that was).

***

It had been a month, and it seemed like he was spitting out bloody red carnations every day now.

No matter what he tried, Sakusa was just immune to his advances. It wasn’t like he flat out rejected them, it almost seemed at times like he was even entertaining the thought of getting together with him, which always got Atsumu’s hopes up too high, only to come crashing back down when Sakusa would brush him off again. He was pretty sure that was making his situation worse, but he could handle it. Hell, he’d been handling it for a month already, he could keep this up until he choked on his own blood mixed with the carnation petals.

Meanwhile, everyone had almost given up on trying to convince him to get the surgery to remove the vines from him. Their pleas would only fall on deaf ears, and soon enough they realized that Atsumu had accepted his fate, whether Sakusa would return his feelings or not. The only one making a last ditch effort was his brother, Osamu.

“You’re killing yourself, you do realize that don’t you?” Osamu had called after him as he watched his twin rush to the bathroom to vomit up the flower petals, which had turned into fully bloomed blossoms instead of measly petals. “You could help yourself if you just let him go!” He didn’t want to be harsh, but no other approaches were working. Tough love had to be the last ditch effort to get it through his head that everyone was just worried for him.

He saw Atsumu turn back towards him, taken aback by the glassiness of his tear-filled eyes. His mouth was red, with some blood dribbling from his lip as he spat out another petal into the toilet. “I-It’s not that easy, ‘Samu.. It’s not like a switch you can flip on and off.. I wish it was, I really wish it was..” He choked back a sob, crouching down on the floor as he hugged the toilet bowl. 

Osamu sighed softly and got up, going over to him. He tentatively rubbed his back as he tried to offer comforting words, but comfort had never really been a strong suit of his, either of them actually. All he could do was just be there for him, “Atsumu… Please, for everyone that’s worried for you, try to let him go, or at least consider the surgery, please?”

Atsumu looked at his twin, a few stray tears slipping down his cheeks as he reluctantly nodded. “Okay.. I’ll think about the surgery.”

“Will you really?”

“I will, I promise… I’m sorry ‘Samu.” 

Osamu let out a sigh and cradled his brother in his arms, listening to his broken sobs as he tried to reassure him that everything would be alright. He wanted it to be alright, for Atsumu’s sake. As much as they fought and bickered with one another, he didn’t want his unrequited crush on some guy to be the reason for his early death. So, he was going to do everything in his power to make sure that Atsumu was pushed in the right direction.

A few days later, Atsumu scheduled the surgery, and Osamu let out a breath that he didn’t know he’d been holding.

***

Of course, before his surgery the next week, Atsumu needed to get closure, and the only way for him to do that was to just tell Sakusa how he felt. 

His symptoms had only progressed, it was getting harder to breathe now and he didn’t go many places unless he had to. The carnations were coming up with full stems, and he could feel the vines in his throat, just sitting there ready and waiting to choke him. Which was why he was hoping that getting this closure from telling Sakusa would help, if only a little bit.

He’d never been to his place before, only hearing about it from some of the others who had been there. Apparently the garden was legendary.

When he arrived, he saw that those people hadn’t been exaggerating. All of the flowers were in full bloom, more flowers than he had ever seen in his whole lifetime, so bright and vibrant that they almost made his eyes hurt. He sighed and pulled his face mask back up over his mouth and nose as he walked up to the door and knocked. His chest was feeling tighter by the second, so he hoped that he could just get this over with and go home.

The door opened to reveal Sakusa in pretty casual attire, a t-shirt and sweatpants with white slippers. There was a cat that curled around his legs as he stepped aside to let him in. “Come in.”

He slipped his shoes off and replaced them with a pair of slippers identical to Sakusa’s. “Cute cat.”

“Thank you, her name is Suzue.” He hummed, leaning down to give her head a pat. “You can take your mask off you know, you’re not going to contract anything in here I promise.”

“No no it’s not about that,” Atsumu coughed at that moment, his chest tightening as he felt the blossoms and blood spilling out of his mouth and into the mask. He could feel Sakusa’s eyes on him, and all he wanted to do was hide. “A-Actually before that, could I use your bathroom?”

Sakusa nodded, gesturing with his head to where the bathroom was. “Down the hall, it’s the door on your left.”

Atsumu nodded his thanks and rushed there as quickly as he could, pulling his mask down to allow the flowers to fall into the trash can. Blood had soaked the inside of his mask, but he was pretty used to it at this point, he’d ruined many masks this way. 

“Miya.”

He jumped and looked behind him, seeing Sakusa standing behind him with a glass of water. “Here, you look like you need it.”

Atsumu sighed and nodded, thanking him as he took the glass and sipped it gingerly, wincing at the feeling of it passing over the cuts made by the vines in his throat. “Thanks..” He said hoarsely, trying to clear his throat. “Listen, Omi-kun… I need to tell you something.”

“Okay.”

He looked at him, feeling his heart squeezing. It really wasn’t fair that Sakusa was so pretty, he was beautiful, like he was carved straight from marble. “I-I… I like you, a lot, I have for a while, and that’s it.”

Sakusa looked at him, and he couldn’t tell what his expression was. He was an extremely hard person to read sometimes, and right now he just looked… blank. “Hm, is that right?”

Atsumu nodded, feeling his chest tighten again. “Y-Yeah..”

“Well, I assumed it was somebody on the team, I had a small assumption it might be me.” He hummed, walking towards him until they were face to face. “I’m flattered, really but I don’t feel the same, so.”

He winced, gasping softly as his chest tightened again, painfully so, almost like there were heavy weights sitting on him. He clutched the front of his shirt, the glass of water slipping out of his hand and shattering on the ground, water and glass splattering everywhere. “I-I kind of expected that.. But it’s okay.”

Sakusa cocked his head to the side, “It is?”

“Y-Yeah..” He nodded, dropping to his knees as he threw up blood and carnations, feeling his throat begin to fill up with them. “I-I’m getting the surgery soon so..”

“Hm,” Sakusa crouched down, picking up one of the red carnations. “Atsumu, do you know what floriography is?”

What the hell? “N-No.. What is that?”

“The language of flowers, every flower and plant in existence has a different meaning, and red carnations aren’t any exception. Do you know what they mean, Atsumu?”

Atsumu hadn’t noticed that he was using his first name instead of his last, but he was a little preoccupied with other things at the moment. “W-What?” His vision was growing dark, he was hunched over and hacking up more of the flowers, but they were filling his mouth as fast as they were leaving it. He gasped, collapsing onto his side as his mouth overflowed, blocking his airway as he tried to get a good breath in. 

Sakusa looked at him, “It means heart ache, I suppose that’s fitting in your case isn’t it?” 

But he didn’t respond, instead, all Sakusa was looking at was the once alive and well Miya Atsumu, who’s empty eyes were staring blankly up at him, his mouth filled with red petals and blood, which was dribbling out of the corners of it. Well, now this was messier than usual.

“Be at peace Atsumu.” He sighed, shutting his eyes for him and going to grab the phone to call for an ambulance, keeping one of the red carnation flowers in his hand as he dialed the number. 

“I don’t have any red carnations yet, they’ll be a nice addition.”

***

The funeral service was a few days later, everyone from Atsumu’s old team was in attendance, plus the national team, which included Sakusa Kiyoomi himself.

He didn’t have much to say when people asked what happened that fateful day at his home, all he said was what happened. Of course Osamu was suspicious, but there was no foul play involved and he couldn’t prove that he had done anything except just stand there while his brother choked on his own blood. He supposed there wasn’t really anything he could have done to help him anyway.

After the funeral, mostly everyone dispersed, but some people went over to Osamu’s place to hang out with him a little longer, Sakusa included. There were flower arrangements everywhere, mostly white flowers, that represented mourning. But, there was one that stuck out. 

“Wow, Omi-san, your arrangement is really pretty!” Hinata gushed, looking over the vase he had brought it in.

“I figured some color might liven the mood a bit.” Sakusa hummed, tilting his head. “Pink carnations are meant to be a mourning flower anyway, as well as white chrysanthemums.”

“Mhm!”

Later, when guests started trickling out and only a few stragglers were left, Osamu caught Sakusa on his way out. “Sakusa-san.”

He turned his head, finding Osamu standing behind him. “Yes?”

“I… I just hope you let him down easy, that you didn’t hurt his feelings.” He said, his voice shaky.

“No, of course not, I’m not heartless.” He paused, “If it helps, he seemed to have accepted it.”

Osamu sighed, looking down at his feet. “No, but… I’m just glad that he wasn’t alone when he passed, and that you were there to help him.”

“Of course, I’m sorry for your loss again, Miya-san.”

“Thank you.”

And with that, Sakusa left to go home, ready to see how the new addition was faring in his garden.

When he arrived back home, he went over to the patch of soil that had been freshly dug, just a few days ago. He’d been checking them everyday of course, but there weren’t any sprouts just yet, and probably wouldn’t be for a while. 

Yes, red carnations were the only colored carnation he was missing, and now he finally had them. He supposed that he had Atsumu’s heart ache to thank for that.

**Author's Note:**

> also, the implication is that Sakusa uses flowers from unrequited crushes on him for his garden (in case no one caught that) also, extra points if you know the meanings of the flowers mentioned in the beginning!


End file.
